Jay-Z opens up: Why I cheated on Beyonce
MORE than 18 months after Beyonce sensationally outed Jay-Z's cheating ways with her explosive album, he's finally explained why he did it.
In an interview with T Magazine, the rapper opened up about the superstar couple's past marriage struggles, revealing that seeing a therapist had helped him realise what had caused him to stray.
"I grew so much from the experience," he shares.
"But I think the most important thing I got is that everything is connected. Every emotion is connected and it comes from somewhere. And just being aware of it. Being aware of it in everyday life puts you at such ... an advantage. You know, you realise that if someone's racist toward you, it ain't about you. It's about their upbringing and what happened to them, and how that led them to this point. You know, most bullies bully. It just happens. 'Oh, you got bullied as a kid so you trying to bully me.' I understand," he says.
"You have to survive. So you go into survival mode, and when you go into survival mode, what happens? You shut down all emotions. So, even with women, you gonna shut down emotionally, so you can't connect.
"In my case, like, it's deep. And then all the things happen from there: infidelity."
While the famous couple have apparently since moved on from the scandal, with Beyonce giving birth to their twins Rumi and Sir in June, it's clearly been quite a bumpy road to get there.
The rapper - who publicly responded to Lemonade with his own deeply personal album 4:44 earlier this year - explained that both he and Beyonce had "used their art like a therapy session."
"The best place is right in the middle of the pain," the Grammy-winner said.
"And that's where we were sitting. And it was uncomfortable. And we had a lot of conversations."
He added that it was incredibly difficult to see how much Beyonce was hurting: "The hardest thing is seeing pain on someone's face that you caused, and then have to deal with yourself."